WHO ARE WE????
AND WHY WOULD YOU SPEND $$$ HERE???
Congratulations! You have just discovered THE best suppliers of QUALITY reptiles.....anywhere! We are located on the moon. We ship our reptiles to you at light speed using the fastest rocket powered shipping boxes. As a child, growing up on the moon was very lonely. I could never find any snakes. When I grew up and got my space shuttle license, I smuggled a large quantity of Big Fat Snakes from Pluto back to the moon. Then I released all the snakes and they took over the moon's prime lunar habitat faster than Burmese Pythons of the Earth's Florida Everglades! Soon the moon was covered in Big Fat Snakes. I was overcome with snakes....so I decided to infect other galaxies with Big Fat Snakes. I began to Export these alien reptiles to every corner of the universe! Now we are the most despised and envied snake slinging scumbags known in history. We provide Big Fat Snakes to the Rich and Famous. They are charged ridiculous prices and then re-charged again every month. This business practice has allowed our company to become more powerful than Don King's hairspray.
That's me, exiting our Lunar Snake Breeding Facility
This is a photo of me. Yes, I know I am difficult to recognize in that outfit. But it is the required fashion up here. These clothes come in lots of different colors...However, when hunting moon snakes, it is best to blend into the environment. So, I opted for the camouflage clothes on today's snake hunting expedition.
